Arrghhhh.....

GO AWAY MISERABLE FEELINGS!!!
I DONT WANA BE GOOD FREN WIT YOU...
=.="

=.="

Why do i have this feeling when i aredy had made up my mind?
Past memories which keep pulling me back?
The matter of time?
Security and trust?

Love says it all?
The one that perfectly suits you..
The one who loves u more than himself...
The one who knows ur thinking in every single way...
The one who understands and tolerates you well...
The one who is always by yourside...
The one who always care for you...
The one who changes for you...
The one who truely loves you...
Is he the wan?
The one and only one?

Shud i do something for mysef?
Izit good to let it be?
Izit good to keep on "reminding" mysef to be cool n happy and yet.. i stil can feel my tears?
I felt so reluctant to reply my colleague that im having problem with my contact lense when, out of the blue, i burst out in the office...
Can i just be an ordinary person... happy, normal and simply life? i dont need a dramatic one...

What is that actually??

More time needed?

Melancholy....

Actions speak louder than words...

Feelings....

You chose the way, you shud go for it...
You chose the path, you shud hold on to it...
Think of future, it gave me a smile...
Think of you, it gave me a hope...
Dont let me know anything that is out of my way...
It may hurt me... it may...
Changes in you, i can see and feel...
Giving a chance for both of us...
Sometimes.... ignore & prevent.. mayb helpful...
"Chill up".. u taught me...
"Babe, im cool"... how cool you r?
Truthfully... Im cool! =)
Never hold things too tight is my principle now..
I can do it! I can do it!
=D
Being this way, is so lighten up!!!
Wohooooo....

~MOOD~

My current frame of mind:
* Going slow
* Smooth
* Lighten up
* In high spirits
* No worries
* Appreciate
* Suprise
* Patient
* Lovely
* Cool - really chill
* Let it be
* Have faith in you
* Shower me with love

Up-To-The-Minute

I just started my internship with Hewo this month...
Will be here till end of Sept..
I'm enjoying my 1st week here =)
My VIVA presentation will be on 26th this month! OMG, super stressed~.~

On another note, miserable moment had "ended"...
Expecting something in future is what i'm looking and hoping for...
I have faith in you...

He Really Understand Me?

Without seeing at each other.. he knows what am i doing...
Without talking to each other.. he knows what am i thinking...
Without contacting with each other.. he knows what i want...
He gave me space and time...
Support, care, choice and respect...
Izit really true from you?
I leave it to you for the answer...

Exhausted

What am i suppose to do!!
Im really tired of all these...
I really need a break at this moment...
Pls Pls...
How good if you told me all these a month ago, before i started to think seriously on our prob?
How nice if u treat me as how u treat me now?
How perfect if u talk to me and say things like how u say to me now?
I really dunno...
Everything had changed..
I almost got to handle it...
Please let me go on with it...
Just see how when the time comes..
Make things clear is my aim now...
No dragging..
Not stubborn...
Just mean to make things really clear...
Thank you for everything...

Miserable...

For so long i didnt update my blog..
Kinda miserable these few weeks..
Maybe is another chapter of my life..
Trying to grab and let things go..
Well, this post is kinda "reply" to someone's blog...
If the person is reading this... ya! only "you" will understand what am i posting below.. I hope you do...
Really salute ppl who said No means No, give up means give up, control means control, let go means let go and quit means quit...
No need clarification? No need time? No respect? No chance? No Q&A? No question mark? Is that cool?
Can i do that?
Set a goal and just go for it...
Dont care bout others?
No need to care others feeling... selfish?
Can i do that?
I won my own heart at this moment.. No one did...
At this moment... No confidence, No rely on others, No fooling, No guessing...
But i love myself! Yes.... I Will...
I want to be tough...
Make things clear and don't drag others..
I will feel sorry...
You guys said i think too much... Is that good o bad?
I love the caring feeling from you...
But i knew i cant be selfish by holding this uncertain feeling between us...
Why?
My heart ache everytime you said sorry to me...
You're sorry or I'm sorry?
Why must come until today?
Why until today we are stil guessing?
No solution?
Not now?
Not this moment?
Lying myself now?
Avoiding it?
.............................
........................
..................
...........
......
...
.

Thoughts........

Past is Experience...
Present is Experiment...
Future is Expectation...

Oh NO!

Few days ago, i saw one of my fren's msn's personal message stated that "Dunno wana go out this sat o not? Coco Banana!" I was like.. wat? Coco Banana? Funny name for a pub, to me... but.... can't imagine that on last sat nite, im in Coco Banana! *tisk tisk tisk* My fren who organized this "gathering" kept on asking evry1 whether izit ok o not? i guess, he's worried bout the new place there and he cares bout our feelings.. Somehow, i don't really can take the noise and crowded place.. age-ing factor, i guess >.< the sound system was great but the remix songs was not so nice.. My fren said that, Barcelona's songs, R&B would be better...

That nite was fabulous.. but... i did things that i won't do, i saw things that i won't see and i thought things that i won't think.. sorry... i crap a lot nowadays coz im in dilemma... *sigh* Reached home bout 4am that nite and somehow, something distracted me and didn't slept that day.. wait let me do a count... 9am(19/4/2008) til 3am(21/4/2008), 37hours i didn't sleep!! My My... exams and thesis writting oso din get me into this. Blur. On another note, i had this stupid eye infection.. so painful.. due to contact lense - highest possibility. Blame "some1"... my slave.... Oh No... im not going to start this... NO!! Self control pls... *crap crap*

Somehow.... i stil can't really let go... but i promise i will try.... and 1 day... i can make it i know... i know i can... "LIFE MUST GO ON, DUDE!" Sounds simple? Duh! True love stories really happen? TV series usually will have beautiful ending.. ok gal! STOP DREAMING.. Im so sorry to have this kind of feelings.. i knew i shudn't... -End-